Wow, it's been a while. Ever since we had to leave our rental unexpectedly in April, our lives have been a bit of a toss up. We stayed with my brother-in-law and his wife for a week, then started staying with my mom. We're still here, crossing our fingers we get a rental soon - NOT because we don't appreciate being here, or that I don't LOVE having all this time with my mom, but because I would really like to have all my clothes back, and stop wearing the same outfit multiple times a week LOL.
On another subject, my health has gone down hill (same story, different day). I don't know if it's been the stress of the past several weeks, or that I've been pushing myself much harder than usual... but either way, it is what it is. A lot has been going on, on top of us trying to find a place to live and while my body was behaving for a few weeks, it has been making a bold statement since that it doesn't appreciate it, and I've been forced to listen. Just last week, I had my worst day ever, where my husband had to lift me off the couch in order for me to go to the bathroom, or go anywhere really. A few days prior to this horrible day, I had taken two Lortab and still cried out in pain when getting up off the couch. My husband came in right afterwards and threw up his hands, said he'd had enough, and we were getting me a wheel chair. I broke down in that moment, realizing this has become a reality MUCH sooner than I'd expected. My mom and my husband don't always agree on things, but they ganged up on me and convinced me it was time. So on Friday we welcomed "Wheelma" into our lives (get it, WHEELchair aka WHEELma, ya it's about as creative as I get these days). I'm in no way using her full time, but anytime we go to the mall or I'll have to be on my feet for longer than 15 mins or so, I use it. My knees especially just aren't holding up, and the pain is starting to be unbearable, even on extra strength Lortab.
The day following my all-time most horrible day, I called my doctor.. I explained how bad things had gotten, she got a little upset with me, telling me I should have called her much, much sooner. She's leaving for Poland for all of July, and my next appt isn't until middle of August. As I spoke to her, she told me that I should increase my R.A. meds, and if that doesn't help, that I needed to call my primary physician (since she won't be available) and get referred to an orthopedic surgeon to find out what damage has been done already, and if there's anyway to fix it. And she doesn't want to wait until Aug 13th to see me (which is my next appt), but instead wants to see me as soon as she gets back to the office in early August. I was a little taken back by her seriousness and concern, I hadn't realized just how quickly things had started progressing until I spoke with her. I called my husband afterwards, and then my mom, and I broke down. I just can't believe I'm barely 27 and already using a wheelchair. I can't believe that walking up and down even 2-3 stairs puts me in tremendous pain most days. I can't believe that simply standing without pain for more than 15 mins is becoming pretty much impossible, even on my best days. I just simply can't believe this.
During the few weeks that I was pushing myself far further than I should have, I tried riding again. It was so incredibly painful, it broke my heart. Life sure isn't what I thought it would be.
